digress & obsess [v2]

i came back from bangkok a few days ago;

broke in serious financial debt

only to have reached the fundamental / unanimous decision that bangkok has only this to offer:

and that is, to add inches to the waistline and a tramatic drain to the wallet.

no la, i guess, there were some other highlights of my trip.

like witnessing this for instance:

which was

(diva shaun; discovering that his inner diva and outer diva demeanour may not be that significant after all)

******

yea. but anyway, in the span of 5 days i managed to spend 5,000 ringgit (just on shopping alone). hence i shall be living poor for the rest of the year.

so what did i manage to blow my moolah on you wonder?

purchases include (without the VAT claims):

-fcuk tunics and slutty tops

- more slutty tops from morgan

- peddle pushers from axara

-the cutest lulu guiness handbag

- 3 pairs of excessively ex. wedges by nine west, ungaro and aldo

then got (stupidly) conned into buying useless shiny, pretty things and even more clothing (i doubt i will ever wear in a lifetime) from the 3,700 shops in a night bazaar.

p.s contrary to popular belief,

bangkok is not cheap ok, shop keepers con you heartlessly, esp. if you have poor will power, and weak heart and ever poorer bargaining skills like me.  -_-

i went to thailand hoping that i could finally get my moneys worth of shopping, but to my dismay, i was dragged day after day to the massive high-end shopping complexes to commit my 7 sins.

but i have to admit la, the stores and stuff they have in these complexes are really a sight for sore eyes.

bangkok has shit kl doesnt even have!

so there, as i scouted around, in awe, i commited the first sin.

lust.

there i was, drooling like an obese diabetic at baskin-robins at the shops and endless stuff, most of which i could barely afford.

emmanuel ungaro

dolce & gabbana

micheal kors

cavalli

missoni

karl lagerfeld

vivienne westwood

ellie saab

and my oh so favourite online prey: salinas & poko pano

fuck. me. 

so as i pushed the flashy glass doors to enter each and every store, falling in lust over and over again, scaling the myriad of footwear, couture, bags, fit for a king 

it dawned upon me, i had already commited my second sin

envy.

me: "ah fuck la, how am i ever going to buy all of this shit, il be in  debt for the rest of my life"

shaun: "sell ass la. thats wot i plan to do. but choose the rich daddys only k. its not worth it other wise "

worth an ass? -_-

then i saw her.

tall, with her waif like frame, hair and (chanel) sunnies perfectly in place, flawless porcelian complexion and stunning profile.  not to mention legs that went up to her armpits.

her silk blouse clung snugly to her 0% body fat frame, strategically exposing just the right amount of decolletage.

"great" i was wreathing, "another skinny bitch with boobs". 

bloddy hell, yo. shes a perfect endorsement package of chanel on a pair of gucci heels. hard to believe, well believe it.

shaun had to shut my gaping jaw as she effortlessly snapped up the gray chanel bag that i had be lusting over, whipped out her black fancy ass platinum credit card and walked out with that very bag in her hand positively glowing.

i was glowing too, green that is.

shaun: "i told you, better start selling ass soon la".

******

gluttony was the 3rd, and most inevitable sin.

for 5 days, i scoffed my fair share of tom yam goong, roast pork, gelato, jap food, lasagne, pasta, and pancakes.

and most of the time, id run to haagen dazs for a cut-throat 11rm per scoop of ice-cream.

cellulite city, here i come.

and everytime, shaun shot me his disapproving-you-are-so-going-to-cellulite-city look.

id look meekly at him and say "waht?

shopping is my new cardio ok?

its like day to night on a treadmill".

we did shop non stop. thats all we did. i have blisters and very very very sore feet (due to unforgiving shoes) to show for this.

******

we managed to steal a little time away from shopping and gluttoning to go to a cabaret and tiger show. 

none like wot we had expected in movies or on t.v

taxi driver pulled up into a dark dirty alley in the middle of nowhere, quite the equivalent of jalan chow kit or much worse, as we got out, it was evident that the patrons outside the place were mainly sleazy old balding men and farangs (white boys).

i got scared and clung on to shauns shoulder,

oi! we had to pay 90 frickin bucks for a disgusting seat and cheap drink. the place was poorly lit with tacky stripper music playing in the background…

the strippers on the podium werent even hot, more like stumpy and flabby, some we wondered were probably trannies. 

there we sat watching in a mixture of awe and disgust, as these strippers started yanking out florescent ropes nearly 50 metres long from their pussies and performing crappy calistenics, involving coke bottles, whistles, bananas, and what not.

all in all, a horrible, unsettling experience, and an utter waste of our 90 bucks each. shaun was too busy freaking out about getting pussy whipped (literally).

we left quite soon after, both angry from the waste of money. 

we both k.o-ed back at the hotel, and spent the next morning and afternoon slothing in bed, munching on jelly beans and gummies and watching HBO.  my aching feet and body prohibited me to move only when i needed to use the bathroom and to get more drinks from the fridge.

we spent the remaining two days in bangkok shopping and shopping and shopping, getting so carried away, we didnt know whether it was night or day. and with my phone being switched off most of the time, the boyfriend thought i had died in an earthquake which hit chiang mai a day back. 

no.

i havent died.

im fine.

good actually, apart from the fact my beloved tan in fading

which means il have to hit the pool and the dreaded gym again.

and with x’mas rolling round the corner, i cant help but feel a little festive.

maybe il get my santa baby a bright new red thong reading "pull my cracker" or connotations of that sort.

*sings*

Santa baby, slip a sable under the tree, For me.

I’ve been an awful good girl,
Santa baby, and hurry down the chimney tonight

heh. heh.

merry x’mas y’all, hope you had a good year.

This entry was posted on Sunday, December 17th, 2006 at 10:40 am and is filed under favourite shit. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can skip to the end and leave a response. Pinging is currently not allowed.